The phone rings) Linda: Hello! Teleco OPerator: Appel collect...

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Reply to Msg 15848

(The phone rings)
Linda: Hello!
Teleco OPerator: Appel collect de Haiti pour Madamme LInda.

Linda: Yes, who dat?

Teleco OPerator: MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti.

Acceptez-vous l'appel madamme?

Linda: I do.
Teleco Operator: MINUSTAH Domestic D'Haiti, parlez donc.
MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti: Alllow!
Linda: Map tandew, what happens?

MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti: se madamme Linda?

Linda: M'pa fout diw speak, domestique.

MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti: oui, madamme.

Mte vle diw blan yo di yo pap anferme kay la anko, paske yap kite peyi-a.
Linda: what the fu..?

MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti: Kisa ou di madamme?

Linda: kote blan mannan?

MINUSTAH Domestique D'Haiti: Blanmannan manje kk cochon la wi. M'ap pasew li wi.
MINUSTAH: Lhello! Mlisiz MINUSTAH, How lwa you?

Linda: HI, Mister Blanc! I am your girl.
MINUSTAH: Forglet it. No more blisniz with you anymlore, bleclause Mr. Desmoulins glave us ultimatlum to leave the si bel peyi d'Haiti.

Linda: Fu..

that nigga.

How I am going to pay my mortgage in America if you stop doing biseness with me in Haiti?

MINUSTAH: Mr. Clintlon told us not to mess with Mr. Desmoulins.

I undlerstland Mlisiz MINUSTAH, but you mlust undlerstland us too. Mr. Clintlon told us Mr. Desmoulins is serious about it.
Linda: (yelln) Fu..

him. I just refinanced my house in America to build a bigger house to accomodate more MINUSTAH.

What I am going to do?

MINUSTAH: No problem Mlisiz MINUSTAH you still can do business with people.

Linda: Fu..

them. I am a citizen.

MINUSTAH: I am solly mlisiz MINUSTAH.

Plesident Clintlon told us not to mess with Desmoulins.

Linda: (Yelln) I told you, f..

that nigga.

I am a MINUSTAH girl.
MINUSTAH: I am solly mlisiz MINUSTAH.

Linda: I am your girl. I am coming Haiti to do it again.

I am solly mlisiz MINUSTAH.

Linda: ya just made me MINUSTAH gal of the year; what's wrong with your people?

MINUSTAH: Plesident Clintlon told us not to mess with Mr. Desmoulins.

Linda: I am your girl. I am coming right now to do it again, over and over.
MINUSTAH: forget it mlisiz MINUSTAH.

Plesident Clintlon told us not to mess with Mr. Desmoulins.

Linda: I love you, Mr. Blanc.

MINUSTAH: PLesident Clintlon told us not to mess with Mr. Desmoulins, mlisiz MINUSTAH.

I glotta go, mlisiz MINUSTAH (He hangs up)
Linda: (unaware) Hello! Hello! are you still there Mr. Blanc?

I am coming right now do do it again.

(The phone rings)

Linda: You're back, Mr. Blanc?

Teleco Operator: NO maam, this is teleco billing department.

We just charged you $2500 for that collect call.
Linda: What the fu..?

Teleco Operator: We're sorry, maam. we are under new management.

Linda: Fu..

you.
Teleco Operator: an additional $2500 for cursing at a teleco agent.

Linda: Mon cher, Fu..

you again and again.

Teleco Operator: an additional $5000 for cursing at a teleco agent again and again.

Linda: bann volo.
Teleco Operator: a fee of $ 10000 for accusing a teleco agent.

A total $20000 will be appeared on your next billing cycle.

We don't accept credit cards or food stamps.

we accept only checks or money orders.

If the check has no provisions, there is a flat fee of $15000 for providing bad checks to teleco new management

Linda (hangs up) mezanmi banm ti dlo sel; men vole anvayi peyi d'Haiti.

(The phone rings)

LInda: (whispers) Hello!

Teleco Operator: Yes, maam. I am telling you that an additional $25000 to be added to your bill for Hanging up at a teleco agent's face. Please maam, you can hang up now. And say, yes sir.
Linda: yes sir. may I hang up now?

Teleco Operator: Your final bill will be a total of $60000 plus 10 percent for I.R.S. 5% for FCC; 30% for France !10 % for Canada; 10 % for MINUSTAH, and 2% for Haiti.

Now, You may hang up.

Then the poor Linda hangs up.

The end.

Hit Em Up, July 20 2009, 9:26 AM

Topic: The restavec situation

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Messages in this topic

Hey Zac, you cannot see that movie and think of Desmoulins--he does not fit into any of the characters because they... read more >
Linda, 19-Jul-09 9:00 am
Ms. Linda, Could you please tell me your doctrine? I don't wanna be confused. The Great King is coming. The Dark Knight read more >
The Dark Knight, 20-Jul-09 5:30 am
Dark Night, I still don't know the answer to the question I've been asking you since you started posting on this site... read more >
Linda, 20-Jul-09 9:02 am
(The phone rings) Linda: Hello! Teleco OPerator: Appel collect de Haiti pour Madamme LInda. Linda: Yes, who dat... read more >
Hit Em Up, 20-Jul-09 9:26 am
Hi linda, i started reading the black jacobins by C.L.R. James, the book is amazing. I think every person who's a... read more >
Zac, 20-Jul-09 12:32 pm
You're welcome Zac. I always assign that book to the students in my Caribbean studies classes. Regardless of their... read more >
Linda, 20-Jul-09 12:56 pm
Hit Em Up/Dark Night/Desmoulins, I wish I could take the time to understand what that long endless thing was about... read more >
Linda, 20-Jul-09 1:15 pm
Linda Have you tried to assign"Independance 2011" to them read more >
Gera Bougui, 20-Jul-09 5:11 pm

 

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